There is a certain, globally recognized theme park brand that advertises itself as being both ‘magical’ and ‘happy’. Those adjectives may be debatable depending on your opinion of a good vacation. But one thing is for certain: none of their parks lack an ample supply of vacationers wearing inexpensive sunglasses.
Have you ever wondered what goes on behind the sunglasses? Better yet, have you ever been the mysterious guest whose face is hidden behind dark lenses? Studying people in sunglasses is a wonderful anthropological exercise if you have a bottle of sunblock and a couple of hours to kill.
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Here Comes the Sun
There may be as many reasons for wearing sunglasses as there are vacationers. However, let us deal with the straight answer first. We wear sunglasses because we know that UV rays can damage the eyes. We have all heard the stories, and none of us wants to be the sun’s next victim. We prefer to grow old with naturally healthy eyes.
As long as we are going to mention them here, remember that UV protection is everything. There’s no point in buying a pair of designer sunglasses with a UV rating of anything less than 300. Olympic Eyewear recommends holding out for 400.
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Somebody’s Watching Me
With the UV thing out of the way, we can have some fun. Imagine standing in line for your favorite attraction and having that nagging feeling that somebody is watching you. Maybe you’ve already experienced it. At any rate, you turn around only to see hundreds of faces with eyes covered by dark circles and ovals. One set of those eyes is undoubtedly staring at you.
Maybe that one person wears sunglasses just for that reason. Good luck picking him or her out of the happy place crowd. You would have an easier time finding an unhappy vacationer vowing to never return to the magical theme park.
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Endless Sleeper
It is two o’clock and you’re desperately searching for on open table at which to sit down and enjoy your hot dog. Not only can you not find one, but every park bench you’ve come across seams occupied by a middle-aged vacationer trying to get some z’s. That’s right, the endless sleepers are everywhere this afternoon.
It turns out the joke’s on you. It’s almost impossible to sleep in broad daylight if you don’t cover your eyes. Some of your fellow vacationers got smart by purchasing oversized, wraparound sunglasses to turn off the sun for hours at a time. While you’re dragging your feet waiting for the fireworks show, the endless sleepers will just be getting their second winds.
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I Wear My Sunglasses at Night
Speaking of the fireworks show, there is inevitably that guy in every single happy place crowd who keeps his sunglasses on even after the sun goes down. There can only be a few reasons for this. First is the very remote possibility that he is none other than Corey Hart. It could happen in California, really.
A second possibility is that he is convinced wearing sunglasses at night makes him look like a rock star instead of somebody tripping over the stroller in front of him. Whatever. But there is a third reason: he may have some sort of medical condition that makes bright lights painful. Give him the benefit of the doubt.
There are lots of reasons people wear sunglasses at happy, magical vacation destinations. If you are clever enough to know what goes on behind the shades, have you figured out the common denominator in every subheading of this post? Think about that for a while.
